Depression Support Thread

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by sarcasticfairyprincess, May 13, 2016.

  1. sarcasticfairyprincess

    sarcasticfairyprincess Well-Known Member

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    I'm surprised that a thread like this hasn't been made before now.

    I know a lot of us on here, myself included, suffer from depression and other mental illnesses. I figured I'd start this thread so we can have our own little safe space to vent and to share our thoughts and feelings, to talk about things we might not be able to talk about in real life. Kind of like our own little club within a club, I guess.
     
  2. blujay

    blujay Well-Known Member

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    I've had the only two ever panic attacks of my life in the last school year. Life is crazy for so many of us. This thread is gonna be a big help if it takes off.
     
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  3. sarcasticfairyprincess

    sarcasticfairyprincess Well-Known Member

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    I hope it does. I know there are many of us on here who have been going through some really shitty things and this would be a good safe space to talk about them, if they wanted to.

    What caused your panic attacks, if you don't mind me asking?
     
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  4. Jake!

    Jake! Well-Known Member

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    I don't have anything to add (yet), but this thread is great.
     
  5. anazapela

    anazapela Well-Known Member

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    This is a great idea...thank you for starting this thread.
     
  6. blujay

    blujay Well-Known Member

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    It's weird because for a lot of people, as is in my case, panic attacks aren't necessarily "triggered," which is how one can develop panic disorder because you don't know when or where the next panic attack might happen. My first was while I was sitting at my desk at home listening to music and editing my dissertation. The second was while I was in the shower. To a certain extent, I think the stress and anxiety over work, school, and my father's illness kind of became too much for me to handle and my body just reacted. It was terrifying, I had trouble breathing and swallowing, my body went numb. I kind of spaced out so I wasn't really processing what was happening to communicate to my wife that I needed some help, so if you do have them it's important to have a partner who can recognize what's going on pretty quickly.
     
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  7. captainfog

    captainfog A Prince Among Men And Moderators

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    Would you guys like me to make this thread a sticky?
     
  8. sarcasticfairyprincess

    sarcasticfairyprincess Well-Known Member

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    I have panic attacks randomly and sporadically. Mine usually happen when I'm already upset. I'll already be crying or something, and I'll work myself into a panic attack. I'll start hyperventilating and shaking and I won't be able to calm myself down. Like you, nothing really triggers them. They just kind of happen.
    Sure!
     
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  9. I'm 38 and I'm pretty sure I've been depressed since I was about 5. It's the only mindset I know. It runs in my family along with addictions of various kinds. I'm opposed to taking medication though because I've seen the zombie that my mother has become on it. And I don't want false happiness. I want real happiness or none at all. I don't see the difference between deadening your senses with drugs and getting a lobotomy. No offense intended towards anyone who does benefit from depression medication - it just isn't for me.
     
  10. GritNGlitter

    GritNGlitter Well-Known Member

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    Depression medication definitely doesn't have to deaden the senses. Emotional blunting is an unfortunate side effect of some SSRIs on some people, but it isn't universal or unavoidable. But life-saving treatments sometimes have unpleasant side-effects, that doesn't mean the treatment isn't worthwhile, or that the side-effects have to be permanent. I wouldn't compare a common side effect which can often be worked out with adjustments to the medication to lobotomy, which is irreversible. Emotional deadening can itself be a symptom of depression, so avoiding treatment is not any guarantee of avoiding that particular outcome. Of course it is anyone's right not to seek treatment, but "live with depression or be a zombie" is a false dichotomy. Depression =/= Emotional Depth and Treatment =/= Emotional Blunting.
     
  11. sarcasticfairyprincess

    sarcasticfairyprincess Well-Known Member

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    I can tell you from personal experience that anti-depressants are the best thing to ever happen to me. Like you, I've suffered from depression from childhood. For a very long time, I was against medication for the same reasons you are. But this year, after a number of really horrible things happened, I fell into the worst depressive state that I've ever been in and I knew I needed to get help, or I was going to wind up hurting myself. I cried in the doctor's office as I told him how I felt. This was about six months ago, and I've tried a few different anti-depressants to find which one is right for me. Some of them have worked better than others, but overall, I am doing SO much better than I was. I don't feel suicidal anymore. There was a period of time where I didn't go to work and I wouldn't get out of bed, and I don't feel like that anymore. I don't have random crying jags for no reason. I also don't feel like a zombie with my meds. There are definitely ways to get around the stoned zombie feeling. I feel like a normal person for the first time in my life, and I highly encourage you to look into treatment. It's big and scary, but it will definitely help you.
     
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  12. kickerofelves

    kickerofelves Well-Known Member

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    Y'ello! Had a biiiiiig panic attack back in November of last year after about a decade or so of mostly calm days (previous panic flare-up was back at the beginning of college). Found a good therapist that I started going to and have started taking Prozac for anxiety, which has done wonders (currently on a 40 mg per day dose). Things still get a bit weird from time to time and I have to watch how much caffeine I drink (which is a bummer, because I was (am still) a coffee fiend)) but have been on a definite upswing in 2016 so far. To quote a favorite album title, Skitter on Take-off - but staying in a mostly good place! Therapist and the GF (who, coincidentally, is becoming a therapist) have both been very very helpful and present.
     
  13. BenMal

    BenMal Well-Known Member

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    I've had depression in the past, and I still actively struggle with social anxiety and just general anxiety, but it's not as severe as most people. It's weird, I mean, I realized that I am a very anxious person, but it's not so bad that it has affected my life to a great extent. I've never had a panic attack to the extent that it was difficult to breathe, but I have had multiple instances of being sort of frozen in a state of not knowing what to say or how to proceed. For example, I at one point had a brief job as a host at a sushi restaurant, but the way the owners made me feel about not plastering on a fake smile for the entirety of my shift put me in a small state of panic so much so that I quit and never went back. I've tried to make changes in my life to surround myself with more positivity, and it does work pretty well for actually feeling better about myself and lessening my anxiety, but trust me...it's still there.

    Anyway...
    Hello, I am an introvert who has anxiety.
     
  14. Baron McLucky

    Baron McLucky Well-Known Member

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    I've been dealing with depression for about five years now. About two years in (two years of skipping class and getting horrible-to-average grades), I went to therapy for a year and it seemed to help a little and it gave me lots of techniques for dealing with depression and anxiety, but I stopped going when I graduated from college. Having a job (much less one with an irregular schedule) makes therapy difficult. I started taking Celexa yesterday because I've had enough and need to get this sorted out. So fingers crossed!
     
  15. DavidA

    DavidA The sun's not yellow, it's chicken

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    I've never been diagnosed as a depressive, hence no experiences with anti-depressants.

    I did experience a panic attack in college once. I was maybe 21 at the time?

    It was an extremely bad week in which I had gotten my heartbroken by a girl who went back to her ex (long story). And I was drinking heavily and dealings with exams and publishing the school paper. I was climbing a stairwell and just kind of collapsed there. No one was around. Kept panting and shaking for a solid ten minutes. I mustered the strength to grab my shit in the middle of work and leave.

    I'm not sure why but I wound up at the beach, just sitting and pondering for the rest of the day.

    Never experienced an attack like that again.

    I did once seriously contemplate suicide but that passed quickly and it was the result of a breakup when I was 19. Bad relationship. Wound up going to a shrink for about a year and it helped me get out of a that funk. I was also dealing with a lot of other issues: my mother's lack of presence in my life, my father's substance abuse problems, my contentious relationship with my grandmother, etc.

    I've gone back to therapy a couple of times since then but I've found it somewhat unnecessary since I've found ways to really communicate my issues, even if it's through passive aggressive means at times. And I talk to my friends and family more.

    Still, I have this deep sense of existential dread that I've never managed to shake. There are days where I feel utterly alone and useless and broken. But they pass.

    And then a couple of days later, I feel revitalized.

    I've never figured out whether that's normal or it's a symptom of something that I should discuss with another psychiatrist?

    I do know that my time in therapy has taught me a lot of important coping techniques.

    I hope my post contributes something to this conversation.

    I'm glad it exists.
     
  16. sarcasticfairyprincess

    sarcasticfairyprincess Well-Known Member

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    Thank you guys for all taking the time to share your stories. I know it can be difficult to talk about topics like this, but I'm glad all of you took time out of your day to open up <3 I don't want anyone's posts to go unnoticed here.
     
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  17. akhliber

    akhliber Well-Known Member

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    Just popping in to say this is an awesome idea for a thread. I'd like to soak in everyone else's posts before actually rambling any, but as someone with ptsd / generalized anxiety disorder and schizophrenia, it's quite refreshing to have places to talk (or even just lurk) among those with some common ground. I don't often acknowledge my own issues as a "problem" as I'm the "smiling clown" sort around other actual human beings, but it certainly makes for a different sort of interesting life.
    I'll certainly be following this thread, and maybe it'll help pull me out of my shell around here a bit more. :)
     
  18. akhliber

    akhliber Well-Known Member

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    I just want to echo others' sentiments that it doesn't have to be a deadening of the senses, or akin to a lobotomy. But I truly understand being convinced it must, especially when you have friends and family members you've seen waste away to medications. I was put on several psychiatric medications and it wasn't exactly a matter of choice at the time, or I quite possibly never would have agreed to give any medications a try. I still prefer to avoid anti-depressants if/when i can, but there are ones these days that don't make you feel numb. Some can be wonderful at helping you to just step back and observe the slanted view the depression can give you, and to allow you a bit more perspective and inner quiet to work through it while in a better headspace for doing so. I've also found that mood stabilizers help a great deal (more for me than anti-depressants, but I'm not sure if that's due to my body chemistry and science, or due to the bias I still haven't been able to completely let go of regarding "medicating depression.") But it's worth pushing past that, even just once to give it a go. It's not a "point of no return" with the medications on the market these days.
    In any case, I wish you the best in finding ways to cope, whether via medication, meditation, talk, music, dance parties with puppies, etc. :)
     
  19. akhliber

    akhliber Well-Known Member

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    I think you somehow made something finally click for me. I've never taken my caffeine consumption into account in regards to my panic / anxiety issues, though I clearly should. For the past several years I've been steadily upping the daily coffee consumption, especially as I've been eating less and less. I'm even fairly sure I've made the connection in the past, and have likely just been in denial about it. :) Maybe it's time to at least try and cut back to a number of pots a day I can count with one hand, for starters.
    I find it interesting that Prozac has helped with your anxiety. It's odd how different body chemistries can make experiences with certain medications so different. I never took well to Prozac, but other medications have worked wonders for me, at least.
     
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  20. akhliber

    akhliber Well-Known Member

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    I have emotional triggers, but I occasionally have panic attacks randomly as well. While it doesn't do any good for the ones caused by any sort of emotional trigger, I've found it to be a great help with the random ones to just make a mantra of sorts out of acknowledging the sheer biological nature of it all. "I'm having trouble breathing because my body is experiencing an anxiety attack, and it will pass. My heart is beating out of my chest because my body is experiencing an anxiety attack, and it will pass. I feel like I'm falling and drowning because my body is experiencing an anxiety attack, and it will pass." etc, that sort of thing. May sound and be ridiculous, but at times like that, any little thing that can help at all can be huge.
     

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